Living the Catch-22: How Aphantasia Reveals the Double Bind of Social Cognition

Having been abused, invalidated, and criticized my whole life, a question emerged when I was young and never left me: "Who are people seeing when they look at me? It is most definitely not me; if they saw me, they would not abuse me."

In my newly published research, “The Catch-22 of Theory of Mind,” I document the lived experience of epistemic erasure through the lens of panmodal aphantasia. This 50-year study reveals how simulation-based cognition creates an inescapable Double Bind for non-simulative minds, formalizing a paradox where transparent communication is systematically reinterpreted as strategic performance. 

The research identifies a Catch-22 of Social Cognition with a self-negating rule: you will be accurately perceived if and only if your cognitive architecture matches the observer’s simulative template. This creates a logical trap where evidence of good faith—transparency, consistency, reciprocity—is processed as proof of sophisticated deception. The study’s longitudinal data shows this is not occasional misunderstanding but systemic epistemic violence, with accurate recognition occurring in only 0.001% of documented interactions.


My analysis extends Gregory Bateson’s Double Bind theory to the cognitive domain, demonstrating how the Epistemic Mirror generates two contradictory injunctions: “communicate to be understood” and “all communication will be reinterpreted through my simulation software as its opposite.” The target cannot escape this bind, as attempts to metacommunicate about the paradox are themselves processed as higher-order manipulation.

The Asiago Anomaly proves this bind is not inevitable but culturally enforced. During this three-week period, accurate social mirroring occurred, demonstrating that the capacity for non-simulative perception exists but is typically suppressed. This exceptional data point serves to indict not the subject but the standard perceptual apparatus of the social field.

This research challenges psychological paradigms that privilege simulation-based understanding and calls for recognition of cognitive diversity in social cognition. It argues that the current dominance of Theory of Mind as a framework creates what I term cognitive ableism, systematically disadvantaging those with non-simulative architectures.  

Read or download the full "The Catch-22 of Theory of Mind: An Aphantasic Audit of the Simulation Error in AI and Social Cognition" thesis for detailed analysis from:
Diagram showing simulation-based observation projecting internal logic through an epistemic mirror, resulting in 99.999% misrecognition of another person.

I am Cristina Gherghel, author of numerous blogs and books dedicated to neurodevelopmental psychology, human behavior, trauma, abuse, philosophy of mind, and mental health. 
I share my perspective not only from the standpoint of rigorous research but also through personal experience, living with multiple forms of neurodivergence from the Aneurothymia Spectrum (and related conditions). 

Terms coined by me: 

  • Panmodal aphantasia
  • Asensoria
  • Avalidia 
  • Atelosia
  • Analytheia 
  • Altrudynia 
  • OMES (Ontological Metabolic Exhaustion Syndrome)

Terms already existing in literature: 
  • Anauralia
  • Anendophasia
  • Anhedonia
  • Asexuality
  • C-PTSD (Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)
  • And others

The conditions described are insufficiently understood in the specialized literature. Current explanations for their causes are often inconsistent with how they manifest in lived reality.

This is why I am developing my own model, based on observation and comparative research, which analyzes the differences and overlaps among these neurodivergent conditions and their connection to early trauma, ontological abuse, and subtle forms of self-instrumentalization.

This article is part of a broader ongoing effort to clearly differentiate between these conditions — not only as clinical definitions but as lived experiences with a profound impact on thought processes, relationships, perception, and identity construction.  

Thank you for reading and supporting for my work. 

Dive Deeper into the Research

My full research papers and thesis can be found on all scholar platforms, for example: 
  • Aphantasia Is Not an Advantage in Long-Term Abuse: On the Trauma of Fleshbacks and the Myth of Coping and Defense Mechanisms is available to read for free on Zenodo. It presents the complete argument, evidence, and theoretical framework.

https://doi.org/10.5281/zenodo.17692334

  • The Zero Point of Narcissism: On the Conditional Nature of Panmodal Aphantasia as an Autopoietic Outcome of Amirroring 
https://doi.org/10.5281/zenodo.17857386

Join the Journey

My research is ongoing. I share regular insights, updates, and deeper dives on my Substack. Subscribe to follow the journey as the work evolves.

https://cristinagherghel.substack.com/

Become a Patron of this Work

As an independent researcher without institutional funding, my work relies on the direct support of readers like you. If this research has shifted your perspective, one of the most impactful ways to support its continuation is by purchasing my books. You're not just buying a book; you're fueling a paradigm shift. 

View my Titles on Amazon UK


My published work—spanning memoir and analysis—engages themes such as narcissistic abuse, trauma, personality disorders, toxic relationships, communism, immigration, C-PTSD, and more. The full collection is available here: Cristina Gherghel on Amazon.
Cristina Gherghel Vox

My work centers on neurodevelopmental psychology, specializing in human behavior, personality disorders (including cluster B), mood disorders (bipolar), MDD, C-PTSD, intergenerational trauma, narcissistic abuse, panthropic abuse, neurodivergence, arelationality, ontological nullness, Aneurothymia Spectrum: panmodal aphantasia, anhedonia, anauralia, asensoria, avalidia, asexuality. I am also an expert on women's health (endometriosis, vestibulitis, hormonal dysfunction, menopause), and have in-depth knowledge of schizotypal narcissism, Dark Tetrad, Dark Triad and more. In parallel, I author novels on toxic relationships and dysfunctional families and write memoirs on communism, discrimination, immigration, and human condition.

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